Thursday, 10 February 2011

Peer Edit Redux

We’re a team. Help out your peers. Correct the following sentences.

1. Washington State provided a subsidy of over $2000 for in state students.
The state of Washington provided a subsidy of more than $2,000 for in-state students.

2. “The 13.5 million is the tip of a larger iceberg,” Coordinator of Arts and Culture, Jerry McCollum, said.
"The $13.5 million is the tip of a larger iceberg," said Jerry McCollum, coordinator of Arts and Culture.



3. “What I know if the system is broken right now, we can’t live in a world with 14% tuition increases,” President Floyd said.
"What I know is the system is broken right now," said Floyd. "We can't live in a world with 14 percent tuition increases"

4. The Co-President’s announced a club to meet more people that are interested in hiking.
The presidents introduced a club to meet more people interested in hiking.

5. Williams said, “There are still new things to say with art music, it’s hard to stop and listen, but when you do it can be an extremely pleasant surprise.”
"There are still new things to say with art music," said Williams. "It's hard to stop and listen, but when you do, it can be an extremely pleasant surprise."

6. In Sept. 2010, the wine tasting endorsement will be available to stores, according to Jane Westman, Culinary Coordinator for Metropolitan Market.
The wine-tasting endorsement will be available to stores in September., said Jane Westman, culinary coordinator for Metropolitan Market.

7. He died from a massive heart attack in Sept. 1996.
He died of a massive heart attack in September 1996.

8. In fact, the club even has their own audio engineer.
The club has its own audio engineer.
 

9. When it blasted off, the shock of excitement from the noise of the cannon added to the emotion of the game.
The shock from the noise of the cannon added to the emotion of the game.


Shorten the following sentences.
 
1. It is evident that sleep becomes less of a priority for many students.
Sleep becomes less of a priority for many students.
 
2. In fact, there is a new workout routine that is sweeping the country.
A new workout routine is sweeping the country.

No comments:

Post a Comment